Why Do Birthparents Change Their Mind About Adoption?

What Should I Expect?

Adoption planning is a very difficult journey. Once you have chosen to look at adoption as a possible solution for an unplanned pregnancy, you may face many emotions and possible obstacles that are placed in the way by your family, friends, and society in general. There are several milestones that a birth parent must pass in order to follow through with an adoption plan.

Adoption Plan Obstacles

In today’s society, it is more acceptable than in previous years for a woman to be a single mother. Because of these changes in society, at times, birth mothers of all ages are often pressured by their family, friends, and church to parent the child regardless of the situation. Throughout the adoption plan, you will face external and internal pressures. You need to keep in mind that you will be the one to deal with the long-term effects of either parenting or placing for adoption. You know your limits, desires, and goals for yourself. Decisions need to be based on what you feel is best for your child, not what others feel is best or what’s “expected” of you. If you decide that parenting is the best option, make this choice knowing that you may be raising the child on your own even when family and friends offer their support. Often time, offers that are made are not honored and you are put in a difficult situation as a parent.

Looking at possible families for your child

Actually deciding to look into possible families for your child through photo resumes makes the adoption plan real. It’s a weird sensation to sit and look into the lives of families and decide which one is right for your child. Coming face-to-face with a potential adoptive family can be very nerve-racking. Birth parents often report feeling nervous yet curious about actually talking to the families in person. With an open adoption, sometimes a birth parent may feel strong about one potential family but have their thoughts changed upon meeting them in person. Personality similarities and difference are apparent during the interview process and it comes quite apparent which family matches your needs and desires for your child.